Thursday, November 9, 2017
Let Hurtful People Empower & Polish Your Inner Good
At a time in history when leaders have demonstrated that it is quite okay to publicly demean others with name calling, or to strike out at others in a verbally cruel way, it presents a challenge to compassionate behavior. How many times have we been forced to deal with difficult people? How many times have we struck back, and then felt bad afterwards? In the following outtake from a piece by advice author and columnist, Kari Kampakis, she recommends that we allow the hurtful person to teach us how not to behave -- something this blogger discovered many years back when working as a retail store owner. Bad, rude, distasteful behavior by some customers were grand lessons in humanity.
“Everyone in your life serves a purpose. Everyone has something to teach you.
And while people who are kind and friendly help teach you who you do want to be, those who are not kind and friendly teach you who you don’t want to be.
So when you encounter someone who hurts your feelings, lean into that feeling. Ask yourself what they did to make you feel that way. Was it the words they chose? Their tone? The way they picked favorites and then ignored everyone else?
Whatever they did, make a pledge. Promise yourself that you’ll never treat anyone the way they treated you. This is how you become a kinder and more compassionate person. This is how you learn from their mistakes.
And when you meet someone you really like, lean into that feeling, too. Ask yourself what they did to make you feel so good. Then make a pledge to yourself to be more like them. This is also how you become a kinder and more compassionate person.
Regardless of how anyone treats you, you stand to benefit. While some people teach you who you do want to be, others teach you who you don’t want to be. And it’s the people who teach you who you don’t want to be that provide some of the most lasting and memorable lessons on social graces, human dignity, and the importance of acting with integrity.”